Over Lily's dead body
by Cat's Tales5
Summary: Typical James is in love with Lily, Lily realises she wuvs him too story. Because there can never be too much Jily in the world
1. Chapter 1

"Morning Lily-dearest."

Lily shook herself out of her early-morning daze and focussed on the figure unfolding himself from the wall.

"Morning Potter," she muttered as she brushed past him on her way out of the portrait hole, hoping he'd get the hint. Lily had slept in that morning and would be lucky to get any breakfast at all before she had to be at potions, so she really didn't have time to deal with Potter. Then she heard footsteps following her down the corridor and knew she wasn't lucky enough to escape him that morning.

"So Lily-pad, it's Hogsmeade this Saturday." She stopped to glare at him.

"Don't ever call me Lily-pad unless you want me to hex your mouth off."

"Sorry darling." This earned him another glare.

"What do you want, Potter?"

"Hogsmeade? You and me on a date?"

She stopped, turned and with a surprising amount of strength shoved him up against the cold stone wall of the castle. When she spoke one hand was around his throat while the other pushed her wand into his stomach, and her voice was quiet but dangerous.

"Let me make this clear once again so you don't need me to repeat myself every day. You are an irritating, immature, stupid, bullying git and I will never, ever go out with you!"

James recoiled slightly, gasping for air, but he was soon smirking at her.

"You know, Evans, we're close enough that we might as well be kissing right now."

She groaned, and pulled away from him.

"You disgust me."

"Oh come on Evans, one little kiss?" He grabbed her arm as she turned to walk away. She quickly swivelled her wand at him and muttered 'Petrificus totalas', grinning as he froze with a pathetic lip-puckered expression on his face.

" Over my dead body, Potter."

* * *

"Psst, Wormtail," Sirius leaned over the gap between their desks to mutter as Slughorn entered the potions classroom.

"Mmm?" Peter looked up distractedly from the picture he was drawing of a rat sitting on a girl's shoulder.

"Where's Prongs? Slughorn is going to skin him alive for being late!"

Peter looked around, realising that his friend was right and James was absent. "He wasn't at breakfast either, said he'd wait for Evans but he never showed up. Maybe they're still fighting?"

"Nope," Remus joined in. "She's already here," he pointed out the red haired girl in her usual seat near the front of the class room. Their conversation was cut off as Slughorn announced the beginning of class. His gaze swept over the room and noted the empty seat next to Sirius.

"Black, where is your friend Potter today? Decided not to grace us with his presence, or is he simply late again?" The Professor asked. Lily looked around suddenly, feeling guilty as she realised it was her fault he was late. She had thought the spell would wear off as soon as she stopped thinking about it, but it had obviously been stronger than she was expecting. Sirius stared at Slughorn for a moment, trying to come up with an answer that wouldn't get his friend in trouble when Lily piped up form the front of the room.

"Potter said he isn't feeling well today, I think he was going to the hospital wing Professor."

"Ah. Well, not much to be done about that I suppose. Thanks for letting me know Miss Evans," he smiled as his favourite student and began the lesson.

"What the hell was that?" Sirius muttered to Remus and Peter at the back of the room.

"Dunno. Surely she wouldn't cover for him, might be he's actually sick?" Peter suggested.

"He seemed fine when we left the dorm this morning," Remus pointed out. Then Slughorn turned to glare at the three of them and the issue was dropped.


	2. Chapter 2

James stared at a name carved high up on the wall, wondering how 'Newton Scamander' had managed to carve it there in the first place, and why the teachers had failed to erase it. Probably because no one had noticed it before, being that the corridor outside the Gryffindor common room wasn't a place where people usually spend hours of their time standing and staring at walls. He sighed inwardly as he felt cramp spasming up his left leg once again. He wondered whether it was because his left leg was weaker than the right, or if Lily had frozen him with more weight on his left leg. Might have been a bit of both. That Newton bloke must have been clever, he thought. Probably pulled of some great pranks in his time. He pondered what time it was, and why the hell his friends were yet to notice that he was missing. James was back to wondering about Scamander, and how long ago the prankster had attended Hogwarts, when he finally heard voices and footsteps coming towards him.

"There he is, Mr. 'I'm too sick to attend potions, but not ill enough to stop me from loitering in corridors'," Sirius glared mock-accusingly at James, who sighed in relief as his mates came around the corner.

"Yeah, what did you do to convince Evans to cover for you, anyway?" Remus asked, staring at James curiously.

"Is that why you're standing like that? In shock that the love of your life, your one and only, the great Lily Evans actually helped you instead of hexing your bits off?" Sirius rambled.

"Why are you standing like that Prongs? And why are you making that weird face?" Peter chimed in.

"Looks like he's trying to kiss someone. Oh my Merlin, did she kiss you? Did Evans finally make all your dreams come true and kiss you?" Remus looked at his friend in shock. James remained immobile, though it did look as though his eyes were glaring at them. Sirius stepped closer to his friend, waving a hand in front of his face.

"Prongsy? Wake up mate. The world isn't over you know, just because the girl kissed you. Oh for Merlin's sake, would you answer me?" Still assuming James' stillness was due to love-struck awe, Sirius slapped his friend across the face, and was surprised when his head didn't move at all.

"Ouch, that hurt my hand! Hey Moony, you don't think he's been hexed?"

Just then Lily herself came around the corner, chatting with her friends Alice and Marlene. She stopped in shock when she saw the three boys huddled around an unmoving James, and slapped a hand over her mouth to stifle laughter as he turned a murderous gaze in her direction. She flicked her wand and muttered the counter curse and James immediately stretched out his back and legs, flexing his jaw to free his face from the kissing expression.

"You are dead, Lily Evans!" He cried, stalking towards the girl who tried to hide behind Alice. "How dare you hex me and then leave me here for the whole morning? And I missed double potions, Slughorn will kill me, or at least give me detention every night this week!"

"Sorry Potter! I didn't think the hex was going to be so strong!" She squeaked. "And you won't get detention, so we should just forget this whole thing, yeah?"

"Oh I don't think so, Evans!" He lunged towards her, but she was ready for it, sprinting out of his grasp and through the portrait hole, heading straight upstairs to the girls dorms where James couldn't follow.

"You have to come down eventually Evans, I'll get you for this!" He shouted up the stairs after her. Then he turned on his dumbstruck friends. "And you lot! Took you bloody long enough you wankers! I've only been standing here since before breakfast, and you finally come to rescue me only to stand in front of my face and taunt me? Some friends you are!"

"Look Prongs we're sorry. We didn't know you had been hexed! Evans told Sluggy you were ill, how were we supposed to know the girl was lying?" Sirius tried to calm his friend, not expecting it to work at all. James could be incredibly irritable when he didn't eat breakfast. Instead of pulling out his wand though, James just stared at him.

"Evans did what?"

"She covered for you with Slughorn. Guess she felt guilty or something," Remus shrugged, glad James had calmed down.

"She did? Oh. Well that was nice of her." A small smile crept onto James' face. "I'm starving, anyone want to come with me to the kitchens?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note: I found this story written I-don't-even-remember-when on my computer and started to publish it before I realised there are huge chunks missing - I'm trying to fill in my gaps but I apologise in advance for the inconsistencies that will probably pop up. Let me know if I've messed up anything big!**

* * *

Lily spent the next three days successfully avoiding being anywhere with Potter where there were no teachers to stop him from hexing her. Mission Avoid Potter included early mornings, turning up to classes early and leaving them late, Alice scouting on her behalf and evenings spent in the library or the girls dorm. But by Friday evening it seemed her luck had run out. She had left dinner early and alone; watching Alice flirt obviously with Frank Longbottom was enough to put anyone off their food. Since Potter and his friends had already left the Great Hall at least fifteen minutes before her, Lily figured it would be safe enough to head to the library by herself. After all, there was very little chance of them stumbling upon her there given none of them except Remus ever seemed to study.

As she turned down the corridor to the library a terrifyingly familiar form stepped out of a shadowed alcove to block her path. Lily let out an embarrassingly high-pitched yelp of surprise as Potter smirked and raised his wand. She attempted to do the same and cast a protective charm, but her wand got tangled in her pocket, and before she knew it she was frozen in place.

"My, how the tables have turned," Potter grinned, circling her unmoving form. "It sucks doesn't it? Being so angry but unable to do anything but glare. I know the feeling, felt it for a good two hours the other day." He stepped closer and plucked her wand from between her fingers. Lily's eyes widened. Surely he wasn't actually going to take her wand?

"Calm down Evans, I'm not going to hurt you. I'll even let you have your wand back, but later so you can't hex me when I un-freeze you. Now, will you do as I say? Blink for yes."

Lily rolled her eyes and groaned inwardly, but figuring she didn't really have a choice, she blinked yes.

"Good," Potter muttered, undoing the hex so Lily could move again.

"Look Potter, I'm sorry about the other day, I really am. You've had your fun and gotten your revenge, so can I please have my wand back?" But one look at Potter's smirking face told her this wasn't going to be that easy.

"Well you see Evans, I could. But I've got you in such a vulnerable position right now, it would be stupid of me not to get something out of it. After all, you owe me one." He spun her wand in his fingers.

"No, Potter! It would be very un-gentlemanly to take advantage of me right now when I'm defenceless! And it's not like you got in trouble, I covered for you with Slughorn!" She crossed her arms over her chest defiantly.

"Hmm that's true. I have been meaning to talk to you about that. Why'd you do it?"

Lily shrugged. "I don't know, suppose I felt bad that you were stuck all morning. Didn't want to get you in trouble on top of that." She looked away, muttering the last sentence as if she didn't actually want him to hear it. James placed a finger under her chin and tilted her head back up to face him.

He looked into her green eyes and gulped slightly, then whispered; "Thanks, Evans." He held out his hand, and for a moment she stared at it in confusion. Does he think I'm going to hold his hand after all this? Then she realised he was holding out her wand. She stared at him in shock.

"That's it? You're not going to make me go ask out Professor Dumbledore, or dance around singing your name, or make me kiss you? You're just letting me go?"

Potter smiled awkwardly and ruffled his hair with his free hand. "Well, like you said, it wouldn't be very gentleman-like of me. Although, now that you've mentioned it, I wouldn't say no to a kiss," he smirked.

"Oh shut it you git," Lily snatched her wand out of his hand and walked away. Half way back to the Gryffindor Common Room she ran into Alice who practically jumped on her, blushing and rambling on about how Frank had said he liked the colour of her shoes or some such thing. Lily could never really understand why her friends got so excited about that sort of stuff. As they headed up a staircase to the fourth floor, Potter, Black, Lupin and Pettigrew were coming towards them, laughing and joking. Alice stopped in the middle of the hallway, expecting Lily to run in the opposite direction or try to hide as she had done from Potter all week. However Lily was just staring at Potter in confusion.

"How are you... But you were just downstairs? How can you be coming from upstairs?" She questioned him incoherently.

"And why would I tell you my best secrets?" Potter smirked, poking his tongue out at her as he passed her, following his laughing friends.

Alice looked at Lily suspiciously. "So you finally talked to him then? And he didn't even hex… Lil? Why are you smiling like that?"

Lily blushed, and muttered something about grimacing and not smiling. She couldn't help telling Alice all about her chat with James, and how surprised she was that he'd been so nice.

"Well you know he's always liked you Lil," Alice shrugged. "Maybe he's finally figuring out how to show that to you."


	4. Chapter 4

Lily groaned as she flipped through her potions book. She had had a long day; no free periods and then a Head meeting with the headmaster, followed by patrolling the corridors with a seventh year Ravenclaw prefect, Jacob Smith. Lily and Jacob got along well and always managed to have interesting conversations, which at least made patrolling go faster. Still, by the time she had finally gotten back to the common room it was close to midnight. Lily was exhausted and wanted nothing more than to fall into bed and sleep for a week, but knew she had two essays due tomorrow which she needed to finish off. Since it was past curfew, she couldn't leave the Gryffindor common room, and the girls in her dorm were busy eating sweets, doing each others' hair and talking about which boys they were crushing on. Though Lily usually loved spending time with her dorm mates, even if their endless chatter about boys drove her slightly insane, the dorm wasn't exactly the perfect study environment that night. Lily had curled up in a corner of the common room with her books, hoping that most students would be heading to bed. However, it seemed today was just not her day; most of the older students were still up, talking and laughing with friends.

Lily sighed, trying to block out the noise as best she could. Then it hit her; she could literally block all the noise out. Why hadn't she thought of this earlier? She flicked her wand and muttered a silencing charm, and was suddenly alone in blissful quiet. Lily managed to concentrate that way for a good half hour, finishing off her Defence Against the Dark Arts essay. She stretched, glancing around the room, before beginning to work on her next assignment. The common room was much emptier than before; a quick 'tempus' charm told Lily it was nearly 1 am. She reversed her silencing charm, enjoying the sound of the crackling fire and quiet chatting of a group of sixth years after the abnormal silence of her charm. She was re-reading her unfinished History of Magic essay when the potrait opened with a "BANG". Lily jumped, as did everyone else in the room, but when she turned to the portrait hole, there was no-one there.

An invisible someone, who sounded suspiciously like Peter Petigrew, giggled and whispered loudly: "oops! I think they heard us!" This was followed by shuffling feet, muffled chuckles and shushing sounds. Lily just glared at the space expectantly; she had known since third year (when Potter had bragged about it, thinking it would impress her) that Potter had an invisibility cloak, handed to him by his father. She waited for the boys to reveal themselves, and sure enough a few seconds later the cloak was ripped off of Sirius as he tripped into the common room. Potter and Petigrew followed, whipping the cloak off and laughing like loons. Remus followed them more quietly, his expression somewhere between amusement and exasperation. Lily stood up from her spot on the couch and marched over to them, hands on her hips.

"Where the hell have you four been?" she hissed. "It is way past curfew! I should dock points for this!"

"Aww, come on Evans," Sirius grinned as he tried to stand up, struggling to hold his balance. "You wouldn't take points from your own house! It's not like any of the teachers can see you now."

Lily watched as he leaned on Peter to steady himself; not such a good idea since Peter himself was swaying back and forth with a glazed look in his eyes. "Oh my God, you're drunk! You've been sneaking around the castle at one in the morning drinking? How stupid are you? It's a week night for Merlin's sake, you could easily have been caught!" Out of the corner of her eye, Lily noticed the remaining sixth year students heading towards the stairs to avoid the inevitable fight.

"Relax, Evans, we didn't get caught. 'Sides, we were barely in the castle, we were at Hogsmeade. Stop being such an uptight bitch and accept that some people like to have fun now and again," Sirius slurred. Remus and James both glared at him, looking slightly panicked.

"At Hogsmeade?!" Lily exploded. "How the hell did you even get there? And how dare you Black! I'm not an uptight bitch, I just happen to understand that rules are there for a reason! What if you had gotten hurt? Merlin, you know this makes me look bad, I'm Head Girl, I can't let my class mates wander to bloody Hogsmeade in the middle of the night, drunk!" Lily had a murderous look in her eyes.

"Look, Evans, we're sorry alright. Especially Sirius, he didn't really mean that. It wasn't our finest idea, we know. We weren't trying to get you in trouble, you weren't supposed to know. Can't you forgive us this one time?" James tried to reason with her. However, Sirius' comment had gotten to Lily more than she'd care to admit, and Potter's defence of his friend only made her angrier.

"Shut the hell up, Potter! This is stupid, and immature and wrong! None of you will ever do this again, or I'm telling the Headmaster, you understand me? And Remus, you're a prefect for Merlin's sake! What the hell were you thinking, wandering off with this lot?" Remus looked ashamed as Lily turned her glare on him. James was fuming at the fact she was disappointed by Remus, but acted as though she expected this kind of thing from him, Peter and Sirius. Never mind that it was only the second time they'd ever snuck out to drink outside of the castle, or that they had done it to try and cheer Sirius up.

"Listen Evans, we weren't just out drinking for the fun of it, we were trying to take care of our friend!" James gestured to Sirius, who was slumped against the wall, watching the argument without comprehension. He was, Lily realised suddenly, in a much worse state than any of the other three.

"Taking care of him by letting him get wasted and wandering around outside of school? Yeah, great friends you are! So disappointed I've been missing out on that kind of friendship all these years!" Lily shouted.

"Maybe you should spend less time judging us for enjoying ourselves Evans, and a little more time trying to understand that not everyone has the perfect life!" With that, James spun on his heel furiously, wrapped an arm around Sirius' shoulders and marched the two of them upstairs. Peter looked between Lily and Remus and shrugged, then followed the other two to their dorm.

"Look Lily, I am sorry. I know I shouldn't have let them do it, and I shouldn't have gone with them. They honestly don't do it very often at all, it's just that Sirius got some bad news today and we wanted to cheer him up." Remus explained softly.

"What, so just because someone has had a bad day it's ok to run off in the middle of the night, get wasted and break about a million school rules?" Lily asked him sharply.

"I'm not saying it was ok. I'm just saying he really needed some time out, would you have preferred if we let him go alone?" Remus was starting to get frustrated with her inability to see things from another perspective.

"Yes! Because then maybe he wouldn't have gone, and would have dealt with his problems like anyone else in the school. Or at least it would only have been Sirius at risk of getting hurt!"

"Lily, he got a letter from Gringotts. His family have cut him off from any form of inheritance. He left last summer, not really intending to go back, but I don't think he honestly expected them to disown him. His parents never even told him they were going to, didn't give him any explanation or even warning, they just did it. Don't blame him for trying to let off some steam tonight, and don't blame the rest of us for trying to be there for our friend." He stomped up the stairs after his friends, leaving Lily shocked and alone in the common room. She felt awful after Remus' explanation, and even worse when she realised that maybe Potter was right; she didn't really know what was going on with Sirius so she had no right to judge him. And Remus' logic did make an awful lot of sense in hindsight, there was no way it would have been a good idea to let Sirius head off to get drunk alone. Lily sighed, slouching back to her homework and resigning herself to getting very little sleep that night.


	5. Chapter 5

It wasn't until two days later, after a meeting between the Head students and prefects, that Lily managed to bury her pride and apologise. After Andrew had dismissed the meeting, Lily called Remus' name. He stopped, and turned to face her with a neutral expression on his face.

"Look, Remus, I just wanted to say I'm sorry about the other night. I still don't agree with what you did, but I know I was out of line and I should have at least listened to guys before I blew up like that," she explained.

"It's ok Lily, I get why you were angry. But I'm not really the one you should apologise to."

"Who, Sirius? I'll find him in the common room later."

"Well yes, even though he barely remembers any of the fight. I was talking about James as well actually." Before Lily had a chance to ask why, Remus was gone. It wasn't as if Potter was the one whose family had disowned him, she thought. And she had argued with Remus more than with him. She had been pretty harsh on him though, Lily supposed, and given him no chance to explain. Resolving to find the other Marauders at dinner, Lily sighed and left the room.

Twenty minutes later she entered the Great Hall and strode towards the Marauders, who were eating abnormally quietly. Sirius and James looked up at her, anger flashing across their faces. Peter looked slightly nervous, and shuffled away from the others as if to avoid a confrontation. Remus gave Lily a reassuring smile, which made her feel slightly better. She took a deep breath and began.

"So, I umm just wanted to apologise to you – to all of you – about yelling at you guys the other night. I was out of line, and I should have heard you out. I'm sorry."

James stared at her with eyebrows drawn, a smile threatening to overwhelm his angry expression. "Well this is a first. Didn't know you were capable of apologising, Evans," he muttered, slinging an arm around Sirius' shoulder in solidarity with his friend.

Sirius glanced back and forward between the two of them, then looked up to Lily again and grinned. "Aw, it's alright Evans. I know it was just your unavoidable compulsion to follow the rules." Lily looked slightly annoyed at this, but much to James' surprise, she didn't argue.

"Right, well thanks Sirius. And I'm sorry about everything that happened with your family, that really sucks."

"Yeah, it does," Sirius sighed, glaring towards the Slytherin table where his younger brother sat silently with his friends. "And thanks, but it's really not your fault Evans." As if Sirius' forgiveness was a cue, the rest of the Marauders, even James, smiled at her and offered for her to eat with them. Lily declined politely and went to sit with Alice, Frank and Marlene further down the table.


	6. Chapter 6

Lily watched carefully as their Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, Professor Zabini demonstrated the wrist movement needed to initiate a protection charm which would protect them from all sides for a prolonged period of time even while you were moving.

"Ok, everyone got that? Remember you must focus explicitly on the spell; as soon as you get distracted your opponent can break through with any decent curse. Now we'll split into pairs, take it in turns trying to maintain the shield while your partner throws hexes at you. Try to move around and hit them from all directions, with nothing dangerous or particularly painful, please!" The Professor broke off as the students paired up. Lily looked to her right, expecting Alice to be her partner but Alice was already facing the back of the room, talking to Frank. The two of them were obviously pairing up, so Lily glanced around for another partner. All of the girls had grabbed their usual partners – in fact the only person without a partner was James Potter. Remus was missing; Lily recalled that it had been a full moon last night, and Peter and Sirius were already clearing a space for themselves to practice. Potter noticed Lily looking around and couldn't help grinning at her. Though they were on friendly terms again, Lily hadn't spoken to him since she apologised at dinner nearly a week ago.

"So Evans, looks like we'll have to be partners then." She groaned and rolled her eyes but moved towards him anyway, swearing in her head to kill Alice for this.

"What do you want to do first?" She asked, pushing tables away with the flick of her wand.

"Umm, I don't mind. How about I do the shield first and you attack me?"

"You know I'll never turn down an opportunity to attack you Potter," she smirked, and James gulped, suddenly regretting the decision. He saw her hand move to pull out her wand and knew that she wasn't going to wait for him to be ready. He quickly withdrew his own wand, flourishing it as Professor Zabini had demonstrated and yelling the spell. Lily looked at him in shock as her Jelly-Legs Jinx bounced off his invisible shield. She quickly recovered and stepped to her left, aiming another hex towards Potter's feet. It took her two more tries before she broke through his shield, mostly because he lost his concentration as he took in her determined mouth and flashing eyes. She grinned triumphantly as his ears starting sprouting long grey hairs, and quickly muttered the counter curse.

"Good job, didn't think you'd be able to focus for that long!" She congratulated.

"Yeah well, you do make that difficult Evans, but I try," he grinned. "Right, your turn. You ready?"

Lily quickly cast the charm and James began throwing hexes at her. Lily was good, staring down at the floor and not paying attention to anyone around her. She managed to keep James out for a good three minutes, and only broke when Sirius and Peter subtly joined their friend's efforts, throwing hexes at her back. When her shield did finally buckle, one of Potter's tickling charms got through and she fell to the ground writhing in laughter. James grinned, glad that he was the one responsible for that sweet, clear laugh, even if not necessarily for the best reasons. He hastily stopped the charm, smiling uncontrollably at her flushed face, wrinkled clothes and rumpled hair as she stood up.

"Well done Miss Evans, ten points to Gryffindor! That is a very effective method of making sure you don't get distracted; however it will not help you actually escape a dangerous situation. Next time try to move away as you maintain the shield."

Lily nodded in determination, but the Professor told them class was over before she got a chance to try again. As she was packing up her things Potter sauntered over to her.

"Good job, Evans. Although I'm a little hurt that you don't find me distracting."

"What can I say, Potter, you're thoroughly uninteresting. And standing in my way." He frowned, but moved out of the way so she could leave the room, ruffling his hair up in distress as Sirius came bounding over, laughing at something Peter had said.

"What's wrong with you Prongs? Thought you'd be happy you got to spend a whole lesson with Evans," Peter commented.

"Nothing's wrong, I just," he sighed and dropped his head in his hands. "I don't understand why she still hates me!"

"Naw, Prongs. We'll never understand that either. Let's go get lunch."


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Re-reading this chapter made me cringe. A lot. I'm sorry. Maybe one day I'll re-write it but I can't be bothered right now so here it is in all it's cringe-worthiness.**

* * *

Lily awoke to the sound of the portrait hole swinging shut, and then loud voices and harsh breathing. She shook her head and looked around blearily, gently peeling the Transfiguration assignment she'd fallen asleep on top of off of her left cheek. She cast a quick tempus charm and blinked in shock when it told her it was 4.32 am. The voices that had woken her were Black, Potter and Petigrew, Lily realised as she listened silently to their conversation. She sat up and peered over the back of the couch to see what they were doing.

"Ouch! Damn that stings, Wormtail! Can't you be more gentle?"

"Nope, you know it has to be done, just deal with it," Peter told James, smearing a thick yellow paste down his arm. James' left upper arm was decorated with what looked like giant scratch marks: three long, deep gashes oozing blood. Sirius had similar wounds on his right leg, though they looked more shallow and had stopped bleeding.

"Easy for you to say, rat boy, you're not the one who has to deal with his violence."

"No-one forces you to do it," Peter reminded him sharply. "We do it for Moony, in case you've forgotten already." James looked slightly ashamed, and muttered an agreement.

"I know how you feel though, Prongsy. I don't know what was up with Moony tonight, he's never been that bad before," Sirius commented, applying the yellow paste to his own leg.

"I have no idea," James shook his head, casting healing spells on his arm which caused the skin to knit back together. "I'm just glad we got him back to the shack eventually. You don't think there was a person around somewhere that he could smell?"

"I suppose it's a possibility. But they must have been on the Hogsmeade side, I checked the map and no-one left Hogwarts," Peter told him. Sirius finally looked up from tending his leg and spotted Lily gaping at them over the back of the couch.

"Evans! What the hell are you doing awake?" He exclaimed.

"Oh shit!" James swore. "How much did you hear, Evans?"

"I um, I fell asleep on some homework. You guys woke me up when you came in, so I heard, well, everything."

The three boys exchanged meaningful looks.

"And what exactly do you think 'everything' means, Evans?" Peter asked.

"Look, I'm sure you're aware I already knew about Remus' umm, condition; I've known since fourth year. And I know he gave you those scratches," Lily gestured through the window at the full moon. "But since being around him as humans would be incredibly dangerous, and I don't think even you three are that stupid, I'm figuring you're animagus'. And Peter turns into a rat."

The three of them gaped at her, unsure how to handle the fact that someone else now knew their secret. Remus had indeed informed them in fourth year that Lily had figured out he was a werewolf, and informed him that she was perfectly fine with it. The animagus thing, however, had always been just between the four of them.

"Ok Lily, here's the thing. We've known about Remus since second year, and we've seen how dreadful he looks after his transformations; I'm sure you've noticed it too. We felt bad that he has to suffer alone every month, and so Sirius came up with the brilliant idea of becoming animagus' so we can keep Moony company. And it works, it keeps him calmer and means he doesn't have to be locked up in the shrieking shack every full moon," James explained, begging her to understand.

"I guess that makes sense," Lily agreed. "But surely it's still dangerous! I mean, you obviously got hurt tonight! And how the hell did you learn to do it? Aside from being illegal, it's very difficult magic!" The boys were pleased to see she looked more impressed than angry.

"Nah, not if we're careful. And tonight was the exception, usually he's a lovely wolf when we're around in animal form," Sirius grinned wryly. "We've been practicing transforming since the start of third year. Prongs and I got it figured by the end of fourth year, and Wormtail had it by the time we started fifth year."

Lily's mind was reeling. The fact that they put themselves in danger every month for the sake of their friend, well it wasn't actually that surprising coming from the Marauders. The fact that they could transform into animals was far more surprising and impressive. "Wait so Peter – wormtail – is a rat," something in her head clicked as the nickname finally made sense. "Padfoot and Prongs, though? What are you guys?"

James and Sirius grinned, pleased to have a chance to finally show off their skills to someone new. Within seconds there was a large, shaggy haired black dog spread across the couch where Sirius had been lounging, and a beautiful stag standing in front of James' seat. Sirius bounded over to Lily and nuzzled her hand while she laughed. James followed more slowly, bowing his head for Lily to stroke.

"Merlin you're soft, Potter," she breathed. The black dog turned back into Sirius, laughing along with Peter at Lily's comment. The stag turned to glare at them both, then tuned back into James.

"Thanks, Evans," he smirked. "Umm, I know we probably don't need to tell you this, but the whole animagous thing we do is very illegal. And if anyone found out we would be expelled, and probably trialled by the Ministry of Magic. So please, please don't mention this to anyone, alright?" He finished softly, staring at Lily with his big, hazel eyes.

"I – of course not. Since you do it for Remus and everything. Just – well be careful, ok?"

"Always, Evans," Sirius grinned. "I'm exhausted, bedtime I think." The others all agreed, and Lily said goodnight to the boys as they headed up their separate staircases.


	8. Chapter 8

"Come on, up you get," Alice stared at Lily expectantly from the foot of her bed. Lily was buried under her doona, with her books spread on top of the blankets.

"Why? I'm studying, what do you want?"

"I want you to stop staring at that book and come have fun with us for one time this year!"

"Hey, I have fun! But it's NEWT year and I have to get good marks, so I need to study. Besides, it's late, I'm going to sleep soon."

"Not tonight you don't! Exams are months away, and it's Saturday tomorrow, you can sleep in as long as you like!"

"What do you want me to do Alice? It's snowing outside anyway!" Lily gestured at the window where snow flurries could be seen falling thickly. By the grin that spread across Alice's face, Lily knew she had lost this argument. She also knew she wasn't going to like Alice's answer.

"We're playing a game, now come on!"

Lily sighed as she heaved herself out of bed. "What game Alice? And who's we?"

"Truth or Dare. All of the seventh year Gryffindors, so you HAVE to play!" Alice grabbed her friend's arm, seeing Lily swing back towards her bed at the words 'truth or dare'.

"No you don't, you're playing. Come downstairs, right now, or I'll tell them all about how much you love reading those raunchy romance novels!"

"Alice! You wouldn't!"

"I won't. Because you're playing." Lily gave up at this and beat Alice to the staircase. At the bottom of the stairs Lily paused to take stock. Mary, Potter and Remus were sitting on a couch in front of the fire, talking, while Black, Pettigrew and Marlene were kneeling on the floor, with Black apparently explaining the items in front of him. There was a small bottle full of a clear, shiny liquid, a larger bottle of what looked like firewhiskey, and a piece of parchment and a quill. Peter looked up and saw Lily and Alice at the bottom of the stairs, and quickly waved them over.

"Yes, you finally convinced her! Now is everyone ready to play?" Peter asked, rubbing his hands together gleefully. They all sat in a circle around the bottles and parchment, while Black went over the rules.

"Right, so everyone signs the parchment before we begin. It means you cannot back out of any given question or you will suffer: in the form of a nasty acne jinx for the next three months. Any truth requires you to take a drop of veritaserum," he pointed at the smaller, clear bottle; "and every time you answer a question or complete a dare you take a shot of firewhiskey. Whoever has just completed a turn may choose whoever they want as the next player; however everyone must take one turn before anyone can take a second. Anything that happens during this game does not reach the ears of anyone not playing. All dares will be given with a time frame, and they cannot involve any thing that risks serious injury or death. Other than that there are no restrictions." Sirius grinned hugely and held out the parchment. "So sign your lives away."

During Sirius' spiel Lily had been becoming more and more positive she didn't want to be a victim of the game, but was too late to back out now without looking like a chicken… And besides, it did sound kind of fun. So when the parchment was handed to her she signed her name like the others.

"Right, I'll go first!" Black announced. "Mary, truth or dare?"

"Truth," Mary said nervously, reaching for the veritaserum. After she had placed a drop on her tongue Sirius piped up.

"If you had to sleep with anyone in this circle, who would it be?" He smirked. Mary blushed strongly and looked away from the group.

"Remus," she spoke softly, and Remus' eyes snapped up Mary, a blush spreading across his face too.


	9. Chapter 9

"Lily's turn!" Peter grinned. "Truth or dare?"

Lily gulped, but considering the questions Mary and Alice had faced, decided to pick dare. As soon as Peter spoke though, she regretted the decision.

"Alright, I dare you to kiss James on the lips."

"Kiss Potter? Are you crazy? There is no chance I'm doing that!" Lily exclaimed. James himself had gone rather pale and was also looking at Peter with murderous eyes.

"Wormtail! That's pushing things a bit, don't you think?" James stammered out while the rest of the group roared with laughter.

"Too late!" Marlene pointed out. "The dare has been issued, Lily has to do it or face a faceful of acne."

"I'll get you for this, Pettigrew!" Lily growled, but she got up and stalked around the circle to sit awkwardly in front of James. They stared at each other in trepidation for about five seconds, before Lily muttered "oh, what the hell," and leaned forward to cup Potter's chin. Their lips met, softly and Lily was surprised at how nice it felt when James began to move his mouth against hers. He wasn't forceful or over enthusiastic; in fact, Lily thought, it was probably the best kiss she'd ever had.

Suddenly she became aware of the rest of group wolf whistling and cheering, and pulled slowly away from James, opening her eyes and smiling back at his grinning face. Then she came to her senses and scrambled away from him, back to her spot on the other side of the circle.

"You certainly seemed to enjoy that, for someone who said there was 'no chance of kissing Potter,'" Sirius pointed out, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. Lily smacked a pillow across his face.

"Shut it Black, or I'll hit you with something harder next time!" He just laughed at her blushing face, and laughed even harder when he glanced over at James who was watching Lily with a small, excited smile on his face.

"Right, my turn," Lily announced. "Marlene, truth or dare?"

"Uh-uh," Black cut in before Marlene could answer. "No one can have a second turn before everyone has had a first. And since no one has asked James yet, it's his turn."

Lily turned to James, blushing again when he smiled at her. "Fine. Truth or dare, Potter?"

James thought for a second, before deciding that Lily's creative mind combined with anger at her last dare could end VERY badly for him if he chose dare, so he chose truth. Lily stared at him for a good minute while he reached for the veritaserum on dropped a small amount onto his tongue; she had really been expecting him to pick dare. She had no idea what sort of truth question she could use to embarrass the boy. Aware that every one was waiting for her, she blurted out the first question that popped into her head.

"Why do you keep asking me out, even though I keep saying no?"

James stared at her, shocked. He hadn't been expecting that. He wasn't even entirely sure what the answer was himself. But the tug of veritaserum made him open his mouth, and the words that came out made perfect sense even though he hadn't known the answer before then.

"Because, I really like you Lily. There are no other girls here that I'd want to date, even the annoying ones who have asked me. So if I keep asking you, it gets them off my back. And because I guess I just keep hoping that maybe one day you'll say yes." James carefully avoided looking a Lily, afraid to see indifference or pity in her bright green eyes. Which is why he missed what everyone else in the circle saw: a small, thoughtful smile flit across Lily's face, before she quickly smoothed her face into a neutral expression.


	10. Chapter 10

It took nearly a week; six days in fact, after the game of truth or dare that had scarred Lily (and quite possibly most of the others) for life, before Lily really had to talk to Potter again. She was heading towards her Charms class alone, as she had had to drop by the library after breakfast to pick up a forgotten text book. Seconds after she left the library she heard her name being called in a familiarly heart-breaking voice.

"Lily?" She braced herself and spun to face the black haired boy.

"What do you want, Severus?" Her tone was tight and clipped, giving away her emotions far more than she had wanted it to.

"I just wanted to talk. Lily, I miss you."

"I miss you too, Severus," Lily's voice softened slightly. "But I don't think we have much to talk about anymore."

"Please, Lil, I'm sorry. I never should have called you that – never should have said what I did. It's been a year and a half now, can't you forgive me?"

"I could forgive you if it was just the name. But I think we both know it's more than that. I'm not an idiot, you know, I know what's going on out there," she gestured vaguely towards the windows, alluding to the outside world. "I know there is a movement of blood purists rising, and I know their leader has been recruiting inside Hogwarts. In fact, I know he's trying to recruit you. So you see, Severus, it's not just the fact that you called me the name. It's the fact that you believe in it."

"Lily, please, it's not that simple. He wants me, Lily, wants to use my abilities. And he'll reward me so well. I don't believe in his pureblood mania; you know I'm a half blood myself. I won't hurt anyone, I just want to be useful."

"Are you even listening to yourself? Just because you won't be the one murdering and torturing 'mudbloods'," Severus winced at the word, but Lily continued. "You'll still be fighting for that cause. Fighting against me." Lily couldn't quite hold back tears as she stared at her former best friend, willing him to see how wrong he was.

"I – I don't want to, Lily, that's never what I wanted," A haunted look appeared in Snape's eyes. "But I can't pull out now, it's too late. If I had a timeturner, I'd change everything, you have to believe me!"

Suddenly James Potter appeared around a corner. "You know what I'd do, if I had a timeturner, Snivellus?" James asked cruelly. "I'd go back to fifth year and take back that night when I fought the wolf off. I'd let you run straight into the shrieking shack to die."

Snape winced, but quickly replaced it with a sneer, spun on his heel and disappeared down the corridor.

Suddenly everything made sense in Lily's head. She'd heard the story from Snape; somehow she'd never picked up on the vital piece of information he'd left out. Fifth year, when the Marauders had been so mad at Sirius for telling Snape to go to the Forbidden Forest, knowing full well that Remus would be in werewolf form, James hadn't simply told Snape why he shouldn't go; he had physically stopped Remus from hurting him. James was staring at her in concern, worried that her state was due to Severus' insults.

"Evans? Are you ok? You shouldn't listen to him, you know, he's a lowlife idiot. And all that blood purity bullshit is just that, you're a better witch than anyone I know."

"I know, Potter," Lily told him coldly. "But that 'lowlife idiot' was once my best friend. And you have no right to speak down to him like that, that makes you just as bad as he is." With that she turned away from him into their Charms classroom. Somehow, her anger had been less biting than she intended after her realization that James Potter had saved her former best friend's life.

* * *

Over the next two days Lily slowly felt her anger at Potter wane and the more she thought about his implication that he had saved Severus, the more her guilt grew. She had been hurting over the comments Severus made and taken it out on the wrong person. Eventually she decided she needed to apologise –but every time she saw him a strange nervous feeling settled in her stomach, and she fund some reason not to. However, on Thursday evening Lily returned from prefect rounds to find James alone in the common room, and figured she couldn't put it off any more. Lily came to sit in the armchair opposite James, and his eyes flickered from the fire he had been staring at drowsily to her. A smile spread across his face, and Lily couldn't help but smile back, though she fidgeted with her hands nervously.

"Hi," he said softly.

"Hi," Lily returned. The two of them lapsed into silence, and Lily was so busy trying to figure out what to say next that she didn't realise he was staring at her strangely.

"Are you alright Evans? Did you want something?"

She blushed, and fiddled with her robes. "I – yeah, I just wanted to – well to say thank you. And sorry. The other night, with Severus, I know you were just trying to help me. So I'm sorry I snapped at you. And thank you for looking out for me."

James stared in shock for a few seconds. "Don't worry about it Evans. Not everyone is willing to stand by while the Slytherins justify their vile beliefs and behaviour." Lily felt a small jolt as she processed that. He hadn't been standing up for her, or at least not just for her. He'd been standing up for his beliefs. And for some reason, she respected him a lot more for that.


	11. Chapter 11

Lily woke up early; far too early for a Saturday morning, was her first thought upon opening her eyes. However, having skipped dinner the night before her growling stomach quickly wiped away any ideas of going back to sleep, and a glance at her watch told her that breakfast would start in fifteen minutes. She sighed and rolled out of bed quietly, knowing that her roommates would not appreciate joining her early wakeup.

Fifteen minutes later, Lily entered the Great Hall dressed warmly, delighted by the scent of food. There were a grand total of twenty students in the hall; a definite sign she was up too early, but Lily had expected that. What she wasn't expecting, however, was James Potter sitting alone and pushing eggs around his plate. Given that there were no other seventh years, or even any of Lily's friends from lower years at breakfast yet, she decided she might at well sit opposite Potter. The two of them had barely even argued in the last week, though Lily wasn't really sure why.

"Morning Evans, this is a nice morning surprise," he grinned at her as seated herself and began pulling pancakes onto her plate.

"Morning Potter. What are you doing here so early anyway?"

"It's our quidditch match against Slytherin today, I couldn't sleep. Guess I'm a bit nervous," he admitted, shrugging slightly.

"Oh right. Is that also why you've massacred your breakfast instead of eating it?" She teased, pointing with the bottle of maple syrup she had been drizzling over her pancakes, at the mess of cut up eggs, bacon and toast that lay uneaten on his plate.

"Might be," he smiled at her. "I never manage to eat much before a game."

"Hmm. Never would have thought it was possible for you to lose your appetite," Lily pondered, smiling softly at him.

"Yeah well it doesn't happen too often." Lily was saved from having to come up with a reply by the arrival of Potter's friends. Peter and Remus were fully decked out in Gryffindor scarves, hats and banners while Sirius was wearing the same Quidditch uniform as James.

"Quidditch nerves got you again, Prongsy?" Sirius asked, digging into a stack of bacon.

"Yep," he sighed. "Think I'm going to head out to the pitch early, I'll see you guys later."

Sirius sighed at his mates ridiculous pre-quidditch nerves, but waved him off wih a quick: "I'll join you after breakfast."

James left the table to a chorus of good luck wishes, but only one thing really got to him through his nervous daze. Lily's reassurance that: "you'll be fine Potter, you're better than all the Slytherin chasers put together!" stuck with him for the entire game. And he really did feel like he was better than the Slytherin chasers, especially since he scored eight goals as against the whole Slytherin teams nine, with his last just moments before Marlene, the Gryffindor seeker swooped past the Slytherin seeker to grab the snitch.

As James descended to the ground, he caught sight of Lily cheering and grinning in the Gryffindor stands. He landed, and was instantly surrounded by his cheering team. After shaking hands with the opposition, and rounds of congratulations, Sirius informed the team that there would be an after party in the common room. James grinned at his mate, grateful that Sirius had thought to organise supplies (because he could tell by the smirk on his friends face that there would be alcohol at this after party) and also that he hadn't been informed before the match, as it would only have increased his nerves.


	12. Chapter 12

The Gryffindor Common room was already buzzing by the time the team returned from the locker room. Music was pumping from speakers in the corner, platters of food covered two trestle tables near the fireplace, while another table held a huge punch bowl, bottles of butterbeer and a couple of large bottles of spirits. James laughed as a second year attempted to pour herself a firewhiskey, only to find that the alcohol wouldn't leave the bottle.

"You're too young for firewhiskey," he informed her kindly. "It's charmed so that only people sixteen or older can drink it. You'll have to stick to the butterbeer." The girl pouted, but quickly smiled at James, congratulated him and skipped away with a butterbeer in hand. One sniff of the punch bowl told James that it too would be restricted to the older years: you could practically get drunk just off the smell. Lily appeared next to him, a cup of punch in her hand, laughing at the look on his face.

"It tastes much better than it smells. Though that probably means we'll all be wasted off two cups, but I guess that's the point," she chuckled.

"Thought you were against drinking?" James raise his eyebrows at her, not wanting to start a fight but being unable to resist the dig.

"No, I'm against getting drunk off school grounds where the teachers could find and expel you, or where you could get attacked or hurt," she corrected, sounding much less offended than James had expected.

"Ah I see. You were just worried about my well being," he poked his tongue out at her. She returned the gesture, and James quickly changed the subject to distract himself from thoughts of where he'd rather that tongue be.

"Well if Head Girl Evans is willing to drink this stuff, I suppose I could try it," James teased, scooping himself a cup of the fruity punch and taking a sip.

She nudged lightly, but he could tell by her smile she wasn't really annoyed. "You played really well today, by the way. Congratulations." Before James had time to respond, she was walking off to join her fellow female seventh years on a comfortable looking couch.

He shook his head, and ambled over to join the other Marauders, who were talking and joking loudly. Remus and Peter clapped him on the back in congratulations, while Sirius grinned and raised a glass to him. "To our very own goal scoring, Slytherin beating, side leading Captain!" The whole room joined in Sirius' toast; even Lily was grinning and holding her cup out towards him. Peter noticed where James' eyes were directed, and nudged his mate.

"So what's the deal with Evans? I haven't seen you two fight in ages, you've even had two civil conversations with her in one day! She finally coming around to your charm?" Peter asked. Remus, listening in, raised his eyebrows but looked expectantly to James for an answer.

James laughed and shrugged, ruffling his hair awkwardly. "Hardly falling for my charm. I have no idea, she's just been really nice to me lately. Might be because I haven't annoyed her so much in the last couple of months."

"Finally given up on her, have you?" Marlene asked, appearing behind them.

Sirius joined the conversation too. "Are we talking about Evans? He'll never give up on her Marlene, you'll just have to settle for me," he grinned, slinging an arm around Marlene's shoulders.

She laughed, but didn't really attempt to push Sirius away. "Just asking out of interest for my friend. No offence James, but you're not really my type," she grinned at him.

He laughed back at her. "None taken, you're not really my type either. Good job today though, that was a brilliant catch. What do you mean, interest for your friend?"

"Thanks," she grinned. "Just, Lily's been wondering about why you never pester her to go out with you anymore. Not that she misses it, think she's just curious."

"Can you keep a secret, Mckinnon?"

"For you, Captain, of course I can."

"Well I figured if I'm ever going to have a chance with Lily I should stop annoying her, and try just being friends," he shrugged as though it was no big deal, but Marlene could tell he desperately wanted Lily to be his friend.

"Well, I think you've made the right choice Potter, it's working."

"What's working?" Lily piped up, catching hold of Marlene's arm and grinning at James.

"The punch is working to get YOU drunk, Lily," Remus laughed at her slightly glazed eyes.

"Hey! I'm not drunk, not at all. In fact, I'm one hundred percent sober, I'll prove it however you want!" She defiantly crossed her arms over her chest, growing more annoyed when all her friends simply burst into laughter.

"Ok then Lily, if you're so sober walk over to me in a straight line," Alice smiled at her friend from behind the Marauders. Remus and James stepped aside to clear a path, as Lily stepped determinedly towards her friend. Unfortunately, she was so busy glaring at her friends, who were trying to stifle laughter, that she forgot to watch where she was putting her feet and tripped over the edge of the rug. She fought to regain her balance, but the amount of alcohol in her system forbade this and she felt herself falling towards the floor. However, instead of feeling the harsh impact of the floorboards, she felt strong arms under her back pulling her back onto her feet. She blushed, as she looked up to realise it was Potter's shoulders she was clinging onto. He looked taller from here, she decided. And he smelt really good. Lily leant in to inhale his scent, then came back to her senses and pulled herself away from him. James dropped his arms reluctantly, smiling at her red face.

"Ok, maybe I'm a little drunk," she admitted, allowing everyone around her to think that realisation came from falling over a rug, and not from the fact she'd just had to consciously restrain herself from smelling James Potters neck. Her announcement was met with laughter, and Remus guiding her gently to sit on the couch. James sat on her other side, and she felt herself unintentionally leaning closer to him.


	13. Chapter 13

When Lily woke up, the common room was much quieter. There was no longer music playing, and the room had almost emptied out. Marlene was sitting on Sirius' lap in the corner, the two of them laughing together between kisses. Peter was sleeping on the floor in front of the fire, and Alice and Remus were standing by the bin, summoning all the rubbish in the room towards themselves. Lily figured she should probably help them, but it was just so comfortable and warm on the couch. The arm of the couch she was leaning on smelt good too, she thought, snuggling closer towards it. She glanced back towards Alice, and laughed as she watched a cup which had been half full of punch spill all over her friend's shirt. Alice turned to glare at Lily, but she was distracted from Alice's anger by the realisation that the couch was laughing too. She sat up abruptly and realised that the warm, comfortable, good smelling couch she had been leaning on was actually James Potter, sitting on the couch and acting as her pillow. His arm was around her shoulder too, she belatedly realised.

"Ahh, back in the land of the living punch-girl? Nice to see you're conscious again!"

Lily's brain woke up, and all of a sudden the situation made sense. They'd been drinking, she had sat down next to Potter, they'd all been talking… and she had fallen asleep. For quite a while, judging by the empty state of the common room.

"I wasn't unconscious! I wasn't that drunk, I just fell asleep!" She protested loudly. This just made James chuckle softly and smile at her.

"I know Evans, I was just teasing. Merlin, you're a heavy sleeper though, dunno how you managed to sleep through that chaos."

"Yeah well, I was up late last night studying. And you're pretty comfy I guess…" Lily trailed off, bright red as she realised what she'd just admitted. James didn't tease her about it as she'd expected though, he just grinned at her embarrassment and stretched his shoulders.

"Well I'm happy you've found yourself a nice place to sleep Lil, but do you mind giving us a hand here?" Alice asked, gesturing to the empty cups and bottles still strewn around the room, as well as all the misplaced furniture. Lily jumped off the couch, glad to have a reason to end her awkward conversation with James. The four of them quickly cleaned the room, and were back to setting the furniture right when Sirius and Marlene staggered off towards the dorms, Sirius levitating the passed out Peter before himself.

"Night guys," he saluted, causing Peter to waver in the air slightly, before turning back to the staircase.

"Night Padfoot. Cast a decent silencing charm too, would you?" James smirked, observing Marlene following his mate up the boys' staircase. Lily laughed and added: "Be safe, Marly!" which earned her Marlene's middle finger. Once the room was back to normal, Lily and Alice headed to bed. Remus and James stayed downstairs on the couch talking softly, nodding goodnight to the girls


	14. Chapter 14

Lily sat in a quiet corner of the library, flicking pages idly as her half-written potions essay sat forgotten. She was trying to concentrate, but her mind kept wandering to her recent encounters with Potter. Since their first year he had infuriated her with his pranks and hexes and hatred of Severus. Since their fourth year he had followed her around like an overenthusiastic puppy, but she had been so certain she hated him that she had kept a shield firmly in place. Now, however, she was realising that he had been right about Severus all along. And the more that she spent time with him the more he seemed like the kind of person she'd like to be friends with.

Lily turned back to her essay, attempting to concentrate on why asphodel root was an important ingredient in healing potions. After about thirty seconds her mind flicked back to how comfortable Potter had been when she fell asleep on him the other night, and how warm he had been, and how she much of a gentleman he had been, and why the fact that he had smelt good DID NOT mean she had any kind of attraction to him. Lily groaned, putting her head on the table and screwing her eyes shut, willing her brain to go back to thinking about potions. Potter's scent drifted through her mind again and Lily considered going to St. Mungo's for a check-up before Potter spoke and she realised with a start that he was actually sitting next her.

"Alright, Evans?"  
"What are you doing here, Potter?" Lily cringed inwardly as she realised how harsh she had sounded.

"Came here to study, you know, what most people do in the library. Though maybe you don't know, you could just go to your dorm if you wanted a nap."

"I wasn't napping. I was trying not to set fire to this stupid essay."

Potter laughed at that, and she noticed that Remus was watching her from the next table while Sirius and Peter charmed their books to put on a puppet show for him.

"Is that the one about healing potion ingredients? I've done mine already, you can have a look at it if you want?"

"Thanks Potter, I might actually take you up on that." James reached into his bag and pulled out the essay in question, handing it to her. There was silence as Lily flicked her eyes over his essay, noting down a few key points she had yet to mention. She handed it back, startled to realise he was staring at her.

"Umm, so what are you doing in the library if you've already finished your essay?" Lily tried desperately to change the subject as James quickly averted his eyes.

"Just came to check out the view," he grinned cheekily. Lily felt decidedly uncomfortable, and a blush spread across her cheeks.

"Why do you have be such an arse? I'm not a piece of meat, Potter!" Lily grabbed her things and stormed out of the library.

James looked at his friends, perplexed. Sirius shook his head in condolence, Remus looked at him disapprovingly and Peter dropped his puppet-book to ask: "how do you always manage to screw it up?"

* * *

"Evans!" Lily walked faster towards the greenhouses. "Oi, Evans!" She put her head down and willed him to leave her alone. "Evans, would you stop running away while I'm trying to bloody apologise?" This last line was said right behind her, and she realised too late that he had been running.

"What do you want Potter, come to stare at my chest again?"

"Look, Lily, I didn't mean it like that, I really didn't. I was actually talking about your – your face. You have really pretty eyes, did you know? And your hair, and such a cute nose…" he trailed off as he realised Lily was staring at him like he'd lost his mind, her cheeks bright red.  
"Please don't tell anyone I said all that rubbish," he looked away, suddenly embarrassed. "I just meant, I think you're pretty. And I don't think you're a piece of meat. And I'm sorry that I always say stupid shit around you, I just try so hard to impress you and to not stuff up and then I get nervous and I do it anyway without even realising how," he took a deep breath and looked determinedly over her shoulder as she stared at him in silence, her mouth slightly open. "So yeah, sorry if I said that the wrong way. I do really enjoy talking to you and I don't want you to hate me."

Lily finally found her voice. "I don't hate you Potter. You irritate me, and frustrate me sometimes, but I don't hate you. I shouldn't have lost it at you yesterday. I actually was thinking how I was enjoying being, you know, your friend and then you said that and – well you're right, I took it the wrong way," Lily stared at her feet the entire time she said this, and only looked up at the end, to find Potter grinning.

"You think we're friends?" He asked.

"I – well – yeah." She fiddled with her books. "I mean aren't we? I thought you wanted to be friends."  
"I do, I really do. I just didn't think you'd agree," James beamed at her, ruffling his hair.

Lily looked at him strangely as he continued to grin goofily. "I said we're friends, Potter, not that I'd marry you. Calm down."

"I thought you hated me, Evans, friends is a big step up in my mind. Now come on, my friend, we'll be late for Herbology."

Lily was so happy to have the awkward conversation over with that she didn't even comment when he muttered under his breath, "besides, all marriages start with being friends."


	15. Chapter 15

Head fuzzy from alcohol, Lily leaned her head back against Mary's shoulder as they sat on the couch in front of the fire. The Gryffindors were once again in the middle of a quidditch victory after party, and as this one had put them in first place for the cup, everyone was fairly rowdy. They were also extra excited because it was the last week of term, and next Friday night would be the Christmas Feast. Lily and her fellow head student, Andrew Boot from Ravenclaw, had decided (with the permission of the teachers, of course) to make it more of a ball than a feast, with a band and dancing for the rest of the night. Girls were planning their outfits, or wondering over whether boys would invite them, while the boys stressed about who to ask. Lily turned around, laughing as Sirius Black caused a commotion in the middle of the room. He was down on one knee, holding the hands of a hysterically laughing Marlene, with a solemn look plastered across his face.

"Please, my dearest Miss McKinnon! Nothing would make me happier than to enjoy thy sweet company all the long night of the Christmas Ball. I promise to shower you in compliments, and adoration, and to spike your punch with Goblin Vodka. There is not a single lady in this great castle that I would rather have by my side to dance the night away with. So please, for your enjoyment of all that is me, be my date to the Ball?" Sirius finished with a flourish, kissing her hand.

Though she was now laughing so hard tears were running down her cheeks, Marlene managed to nod and choke out a "yes", to which Sirius whooped, stood up and pecked her on the lips, then ran around the room collecting high-fives from people. Lily turned back to Mary, still laughing, only to see her friend walking towards the drinks table. In her place was Potter, laughing at his best friends antics.

"So how come it works when Sirius makes a declaration like that to Marlene, but when I did it in fourth year you told me to take the Great Squid to the Halloween Dance?" Potter asked, grinning.

"I think it might have something to do with the fact that Sirius was joking, while you were deadly serious with your proposals of dates, sex and happily ever after." Lily stuck her tongue out at him, laughing.

"Ah, right, I think I understand now. So grand declarations of love and adoration should only be made when there is actually no love or adoration involved?" he wondered.

Lily's brain struggled to comprehend that one for a couple of seconds. "Ok, forget my first argument. It worked because Marlene doesn't hate Sirius like I hated you in fourth year," she explained, summoning herself another cup of punch. James looked at her in surprise and then cracked up laughing.

"Everyone in here could be summoning themselves drinks all the time, but instead the idiots walk over to the drinks table?" he quickly followed suit and summoned himself a firewhiskey, the two of them laughing at their realization.

"Well, I mean if everyone did it, it would be a warzone in here, with bottles flying into peoples heads. Let's keep this trick to ourselves shall we?" Lily asked, leaning towards him conspiratorially.

James agreed, laughing even harder. Then he turned back to Lily with a serious look in his eyes, smile still on his face. "Like you hated me in fourth year? Does that mean you don't hate me any more, Evans?" His tone was lightly teasing, but Lily was fairly sure he wasn't actually joking.

"I guess it does Potter. I mean, you're no where near as infuriating as you used to be," she smiled tipsily, leaning her head on his shoulder.

"Thanks," he murmured, resisting the urge to wrap an arm around her and pull her closer. He regretted it instantly, as she pulled away to stretch.

"Anyway, speaking of the Ball, who're you going with? Heard there are some sixth year Hufflepuff's who'd love to accompany you. I think their exact words were: "he's so sexy and charming. He'd be a great date,"" Lily imitated in a squeaky voice, finishing with a loud, dreamy sigh. James laughed awkwardly.

"Definitely not the Hufflepuff fangirls. I haven't got a date yet actually, have you?"

"Nope. I mean a couple of people asked but I wasn't really interested. Guess I'll be spending a lot of time organising stuff on the night, and wouldn't be a very good date anyway," she said.

"Nah, I'm sure everything will run just fine. You should go with someone, even just as friends, and have a good time. I'm sure they wouldn't mind too much if you had to duck off now and again." Lily couldn't help but admit that his logic made sense.

"Yeah, I suppose you're right Potter. Maybe I will go with someone. If anyone else asks me," she laughed softly. James turned to look at her seriously.

"Go with me then? I promise I won't get mad if you disappear, and I'll keep the grand declarations to a minimum," he grinned.

"Ok," Lily agreed, grinning at him as she drained the end of her punch.


	16. Chapter 16

"Ok? I said Ok? What the hell was I thinking? I obviously wasn't. Why did I agree to this, this is a terrible idea! We don't even like each other!" It had seemed like a perfectly normal request at the time; she hadn't even thought about her answer. It was only later, as she watched him laughing and smiling with Remus that it had hit her. She was going to the ball with Potter. James Potter. The boy she had hated for five years, tolerated for one and half and turned down at least a hundred times. Which is why she was now pacing her empty dorm, talking to herself, while the party went on downstairs. Except that it wasn't as empty as she'd thought, Lily realised as she spun on her heel again and saw Alice and Mary sitting on Alice's bed, gaping at her.

"Oh shit," she exclaimed.

"You said ok to what Lil?" Mary demanded.

"Oh, nothing. It's – it's nothing. Why are you up here anyway?"

"Frank and I hate an argument today," Alice told her. "I was just asking Mary for advice. But you're not getting away with changing the subject that easily, what have you agreed to with whom?"

"Oh fine then, I'll tell you, but we're coming back to this fight with Frank later. Potter asked me to the ball. And I said 'ok.'" Lily covered her ears as Mary squealed in delight and Alice shouted her name in shock.

"LILY! You said yes to Potter?"

"No! I said 'ok' to Potter. I dunno, I wasn't thinking. And we were just talking about how I should go with someone and have a good time instead of just doing Head Girl stuff all night, and it all made sense, and then he asked me and I said 'ok'." She stopped to draw a breath, her face red.

"Lily, dunno how to tell to this but saying "ok" in this case is exactly the same as saying "yes," Alice informed her. Lily threw herself on her bed dramatically, and buried her head in the pillow.

Mary sat next to her, trying not to laugh as she rubbed her friends shoulders. "Look, Lil why are you so bothered about this? You'll be escorted in to the ball by Potter, dance with him for a couple of songs and then probably split up and enjoy the night separately anyway. I mean, you were saying yesterday how much you wished you could go with someone who wouldn't get offended if you had to disappear; isn't this what you wanted?" she asked cautiously.

"No! I wanted to go with someone charming as my date, who wouldn't be happy for me to disappear because he'll be too busy pulling pranks with his mates anyway. I wanted to go with someone who I actually get along with, and who I might possibly have a romantic interest in!" She stood up and started pacing

"Alright Lil, calm down! Look, it's not like you and Potter hate each other anymore, you haven't fought in weeks. As for having an actual date, who is it you'd be interested in? Jacobs asked you and you said you weren't that keen on him, which I seem to remember you following up with "lucky I wouldn't want to date any Hogwarts boys anyway". This way you don't have to go alone."

Lily paused in her pacing, letting Alice's logic sink into her alcohol-fogged mind. She groaned, and sank down next to them on the bed. "I suppose you're right, I just wasn't expecting myself to do this. When you put it like that it makes perfect sense, it's just that I can't believe I agreed to go to the ball with Potter! I mean, what if he thinks this is a real date? There's no way I'm dating Potter! And if he so much as tries to kiss me, I'll hex his dick to grow that ugly, itchy blue rash Peter had last semester, and refuse to take it off."

"Well why are you complaining so much Lil? Just explain to him that it's purely a friends-date for the sake of convenience, I'm sure he'll be fine with that," Mary reasoned.

"Yes, but I don't want to make an idiot of myself if he already knows it's a friends-only thing! Then he'll think I've been thinking he wants more than he does, and he'll be insulted!"

Alice didn't even try to untangle Lily's confusing, slightly slurred sentence. "Well then just go with him and wait and see. And if he tries to kiss you then you can just tell him you only want to be friends," she suggested.

"I don't want to lead him on though! He'd be so disappointed if he thinks it's a real date the whole time, then I go and let him down!"

"So now you care about his feelings?" Mary smirked slightly at her distraught friend. "Look Lil, you're drunk and tired and definitely overthinking this one. We're going to go back downstairs, you can either come join us and enjoy the rest of the night, or you can go to sleep. Either way, let this go and think about it tomorrow when your head is clearer, and then decide whether you wanna talk to him or not."

"I can't go back down there! Potter's there! No, I think I'll just go to bed. Thanks guys." The two girls told her that she was welcome, bid her goodnight and headed downstairs. Lily swore she heard them crack up laughing as the dorm door swung shut behind them, but she couldn't really bring herself to care that they were laughing at her. She changed, washed her face and brushed her teeth, then snuggled into bed. Despite her best efforts however, she didn't fall asleep until well after the party had finished, and her dorm mates (or most of them, at least) had stumbled back to bed. She was too busy replaying her conversation with Potter in her head, and flipping between panic and a strange satisfaction that made her panic even more.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: So a few people were asking why I haven't mentioned that James is Head Boy, and the answer is that in my story he's not. I didn't remember it ever being mentioned that he was in HP (have since done my research and it is), so that's how I wrote this. I'm not going to change it because there's a chapter coming up where he is very purposely not-Head Boy and I'm too lazy to change it around.**

* * *

Lily twisted a strand of her red hair nervously around her finger. She had been avoiding Potter for three days now, delaying the conversation about the type of 'date' the ball would be, despite having decided when she woke after the Quiditch party that she would talk to him about it. She had managed to convince herself that it was fine to keep putting it off, because there had yet to be a good opportunity for her to speak to him alone. This would be awkward enough without any of their friends listening in! And she couldn't exactly drag him away from his friends for a private chat, that would only serve to make them ridiculously curious and annoying. But now, the perfect opportunity had presented itself. Lily had been sitting in the library, working on a particularly difficult Charms essay, when Potter entered the library alone and sat down a couple of tables over from her, oblivious to her presence as he scratched at his parchment and flicked through a text book now and again. But still, lily had been staring at him for a good ten minutes now, without moving. She sighed, summoned all of her Gryffindor courage – there had to be some in there somewhere, otherwise she would have been sorted into Ravenclaw, right? – and pulled herself out of her seat towards Potter's table.

"Hey, Potter," she greeted, leaning against his table. He looked up, startled, but quickly recovered and then grinned at her.

"Hey Lily-pilly, what's up?"

She grimaced at the nick-name. "That's the worst one yet, don't ever call me that again," she groaned.

"Ok, sorry," he said, with a very unapologetic grin on his face. "What's up, anyway?"

"I just wanted to umm, talk to you about the, you know, about the ball," she stammered out, blushing.

"Uh-oh, what are you ditching me for a real date now?" James teased, looking curious.

"What? No, I'm not ditching you," Lily saw his mouth smile quickly at that. "I just wanted to check, well, what you thought, you know about us going together?" She blurted out.

"Evans, I have no idea what you're on about. What are you trying to ask?"

"Ok, well, it's just that I told the girls in my dorm about what I said, you know, at the party on Saturday night, and they took it the wrong way and thought we were going together as you know, a real date and not just each others dates, and so I wanted to make sure you didn't take it like that too. But since you just asked if I found a real date, I'm assuming you didn't and I think I'll just leave now before I embarrass either of us anymore," Lily said, all in a rush. But as she turned to leave the table, Lily felt a strong, warm hand close around her forearm.

"Evans wait," she couldn't quite place his tone as she turned back to face him, blushing brightly. "I know we haven't gotten along spectacularly in the past. When I asked you to go to the ball with me I was drunk, and not really thinking straight. Yes, I want you to be my date, but I was under the impression we were going as friends and not an actual couple-like date. Does that answer your question?" He offered her a small, reassuring smile.

"Yes – I, yes it does. Thanks Potter. I just wanted to make sure we're on the same page and all, so I'm glad we cleared that one up," she smile back, relieved.

"Well we are. Also, what colour dress are you wearing? Just so I can get a tie that matches."

Lily was taken aback; she hadn't even though of that. "Oh, my dress is cream, but it has emerald green sash if you wanted to get a green tie."

"Excellent, thanks. Well I really need to get this essay done, so I'll see you in transfiguration yeah?" he smiled again.

"Oh, yeah, sure," Lily agreed, heading back to her own table. Well that had been easier than expected, she thought. Potter really was being nice about the whole situation, it was slightly bemusing. She shook her head, and turned her focus back to her essay.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: I'm not entirely sure where my head was at when I wrote this story, but given that all my characters seem to be somewhat alcoholics it can't have been good. Sorry if you don't like alcoholism (also sorry that this warning is like 6 chapters too late)**

* * *

James sucked in a breath as Lily descended the stairs from the girls' dormitory, chatting with Mary and Marlene. James was waiting on the couches, with Sirius and Remus who were accompanying Lily's two friends, but he stood up immediately when he saw Lily. Her dress was indeed cream, in a light, shimmering material that highlighted her slim frame. The top had two thick straps, coming to meet in a V shape on her chest, where a small gold necklace adorned her cleavage. Which, James thought to himself, looked incredible. He managed to draw his eyes away from her boobs before she noticed, but was quickly distracted by her legs. The dress fell to just above her knees, leaving her legs bare. Her shoes, high, strappy heels in the same green as the silky sash that decorated her waistline, made her legs look long and slim. James pulled his eyes back up to her face, just in time to catch her eyes wandering appreciatively over his frame in his tailored black dress robes. The two of them grinned at each other and he offered her his arm silently. She grinned and took it, nervously brushing back a strand of hair which she had left free of the elaborate twist on the back of her head. It wasn't until they were out of the portrait hole and making their way to the Great Hall that James broke the silence.

"You look gorgeous tonight, Evans."

"Thanks Potter, you scrub up pretty well yourself you know," she returned, grinning at his compliment.

"Seriously though, you'll be beating the boys off with a stick. Or hexing them, which I guess still involves a stick," he mused. She simply laughed at him, blushing slightly. They made their way to the hall in silence, both trying to think of things to say. The awkwardness disappeared as they entered the hall, where class mates greeted and complimented them. James stared around in shock, while Lily just smiled; having spent the day setting up, she knew exactly what the Hall would look like. In place of the usual long house tables, smaller round tables dotted around the back half of the hall, decked in white tablecloths and shining plates and glasses. The middle of each table held an ice statue, each one different but relevant to the Christmas theme. In the middle of the room was a huge Christmas tree, covered in tinsel, lights and candy decorations. The walls too were decked out in fairy lights; actually fairies in small glass bulbs, and the ceiling had been charmed to mimic falling snow, despite the fact that it was actually quite clear outside tonight. A band was set up where the teachers' table usually was, playing soft Christmas carols while students chatted and laughed as they found their place cards on the various tables. In front of the band a large floor space had been cleared; intended to be the dancefloor later on.

"You did this?" James breathed in awe, glancing around at the mistletoe which was floating about, ready to trap unsuspecting couples and wondering if he could manage to get Lily under one of those. She'd probably hex his balls off, he thought, discarding the idea quickly.

"Well the teachers did most of the work, Andrew and I just came up with the ideas and finished off the decorations," Lily blushed, pleased by his reaction.

"It's amazing Evans, seriously. Don't think I could have done it better myself. Although," he said with an impish grin, "I do hope those punch bowls (he pointed to the large glass bowls on each table) will be holding something remotely alcoholic?"

"Not even a little bit," she elbowed him gently in the side. "There are first years here, Potter!"

"Naw, you ruin all the fun. Doesn't matter though, Sirius and I have organised supplies for the after party," he smirked, still taking in the decorations and their well dressed schoolmates.

"What do you mean after party? There's no after party," Lily stared at James in confusion, in between greeting class mates and accepting compliments both on her appearance and the Hall in general.

"Well," he leaned in to whisper in her ear, and felt her shiver slightly at his warm breath, "we figured the teachers will kick everyone out of here at what, one?"

"Twelve thirty, actually."

"Right, twelve thirty. Which is much too early for the party to finish, so we're going to have our own little celebration in the common room afterwards for anyone who wants to join us. Try to keep it on the downlow though, we don't want too many students from other houses hearing about this, or we'll definitely get busted."

Lily just looked at him in surprise, but was caught up in conversation with some seventh year Ravenclaws before she could respond. Once they were done chatting, Lily led James quickly to their table. He was happy to find that they were also going to be sitting with Marlene and Sirius, Remus and Mary, Alice and Frank and Peter and his date, a fifth year Gryffindor called Jess. Lily and James chatted between themselves, and then with the others at the table. It didn't take long before the Hall was full, and the Headmaster announced the beginning of the feast. James' stomach rumbled, and he was thrilled to see the punch bowl suddenly full and an entrée on everyone's individual plates. He poured both himself and Lily glasses of punch, then dug into his food; a small chicken pasta. The two of them chatted amiably about the food, and James managed to distract Lily as Sirius spiked both his own and James' punch glasses with goblin vodka from a small, silver flask. He was having a great time enjoying the food, the company of his friends and most of all having actual conversation with Lily. They discussed what classes they were taking and why; James was glad to see that Lily looked impressed when she found out he was taking classes that would get him into the Auror academy, and he was equally as impressed when she told him she wanted to be healer. They then joined a conversation with the whole table about which professors were the best and the worst. The whole table was in hysterics at Marlene's Slughorn impersonation, and Sirius' best Dumbledore facial expressions.

As the main course of steak was served, Andrew Boot came and tapped Lily on the shoulder. "Sorry to interrupt, Lily, but the Professors want us to go over a few of the plans for later again," he rolled his eyes. "Do you mind coming with me?"

Lily smiled apologetically at James, then looked regretfully at her dinner. "Yeah, of course."

"Don't worry, you go, I'll keep the animals off your food until you come back," James promised, gesturing to Remus and Peter who were attacking their steaks as if they hadn't been fed for a month. Lily thanked him with a smile and headed over to the teachers table with Andrew. Damn her legs looked amazing in those shoes, James thought. And her bum. Not that he'd ever tell her that for fear of being murdered, but he was sure every male in the room agreed with him that night. He glared daggers at an oblivious Slytherin who followed Lily with his eyes as she walked past, before Sirius' hand waved in his face and brought him back to reality.

"You going to eat you dinner mate, or just drool over Evans all night?" Sirius asked, pouring James another punch and topping it up with vodka.

"Oh shut up! Can you blame me for not being able to keep my eyes off her?" James gestured to where Lily was chatting with Andrew, Professor Zabini and Professor Dumbledore. He did turn his attention to the food though, casting a quick warmth-preserving charm over Lily's dinner before digging into his own. Everyone else had finished dinner by the time Lily returned. She immediately began to eat, turning to Alice who was sitting on her left to thank her for the warming charm.

"What Lily? I didn't put any charms on your food?" Alice looked away from Frank in confusion.

"Actually, that was me," James told her. Lily recovered from her surprise quickly, turning back to face her date.

"Oh right, never mind, Alice. Thanks Potter, that was really nice of you."

"No worries," he shrugged. "Didn't want your night spoiled any more than it has to be." With that, James turned back to his conversation with Sirius, Marlene and Peter about what the best attacking formation was for the Gryffindor Chasers in their upcoming game against Hufflepuff, leaving a surprised Lily in peace to devour her food. About three seconds after she had finished and her plate had disappeared, chocolate mousse topped with strawberries appeared. As they began to eat dessert, while Lily was distracted talking to Alice and Frank, Sirius leant towards James' punch with his flask. James put a hand on Sirius' elbow and whispered "no more", pushing him gently away.

"Really mate? You drunk already?" Sirius asked in a low voice.

"No, just enjoying the buzz. But I really don't want to piss Lily off and I think drinking at her ball might do that. I'll just catch up to you later," he winked, referring to the stocks of alcohol currently hidden in their dorm. Sirius shook his head at James, and instead offered the flask to Marlene who accepted with a giggle. Sirius must have been sneaking it to her all night, James realised, as there was no way a sober Marlene McKinnon would giggle like that. He was distracted as Lily tapped his forearm lightly.

"Did you enjoy dessert?" She grinned at him, her eyes focussing on his lips.

"I umm, yeah, it was great," he mumbled, distracted by her gaze. Did that mean she wanted to kiss him?

"I can tell," Lily gestured to his empty plate. "Though if you enjoyed it so much, I thought you would have put it in your mouth instead of on your face," she teased, reaching up to gently wipe some chocolate mousse off the corner of his lips. He felt them tingle where her thumb had brushed, and had to fight his fuzzy brain to mutter out a "thank you", disappointed as she pulled away. After a few seconds of shock, he got his senses back enough to start a coherent conversation.

"So, what exactly have you got planned for us after everyone's finished dinner?" He asked.

"You'll just have to wait and see," she said. "Speaking of which, I should go help fix that. Hey, Remus, you ready?"

Remus looked up from his conversation with Mary on the other side of the table. "Yep, sure Lily. Sorry Mary, prefect stuff. I'll be back soon though," he smiled as he got up and he and Lily headed to the base of the giant Christmas tree, where the other prefects had started to gather. James sighed as he stared after them.

"You alright, Prongsy?" Sirius asked quietly.

James shook himself and forced a smile. "Yeah. Just feel like I've barely gotten to speak to Lily all night. I did say I wouldn't mind her doing Head Girl stuff though, so I shouldn't really complain."

"Hey, at least she agreed to come. I never thought we'd see the day," Marlene joined in.

"Neither did I McKinnon," James shook his head in disbelief. "Though we are only here as friends, so it probably doesn't count."

"Well being her friend is definitely a step up from being her 'irritating, pesky, stupid, arrogant, ground worshipping admirer'," Marlene pointed out.

"Why am I certain that all those adjectives came from Lily herself?" James groaned.

"Because they did, Potter," Marlene laughed, leaning on Sirius' shoulder.


	19. Chapter 19

Just as the last students finished dessert and the plates vanished, Dumbledore stood up and amplified his voice. "Ok students, now that dinner is over please make your way to the dance floor so your prefects can ready the room for the fun part of the evening!" He grinned, and the students dutifully began filtering into the cleared space near the front of the hall as the band began to play a more up-beat song. As students left their tables, the prefects, led by Lily and Andrew, transformed them into smaller bar tables adorned only by punch bowls, or couches for students to sit on. All the ice sculptures rose into the air, and at a spell from Dumbledore began dancing around above the band. The fairy lights dimmed, smoke floated across the ground, and strobe and laser lights began flashing across the front half of the room. All the students cooed in shock and excitement, quite a few of whom followed Marlene and Sirius onto the floor, where they had already begun to dance, or more accurately, jump up and down and wave their arms to the music. James grinned at his friends' terrible dancing and went to find Lily.

"This is incredible, Lily. You've done an amazing job," he informed her.

"Thanks, Potter, I'm glad you like it. It really wasn't all me though," she told him.

"Don't listen to her, she did most of it," Andrew informed him with a smile, as Mary joined their circle.

"Either way," Mary said, "thanks guys, this is brilliant!" James agreed with her, and then smiled at Lily as Andrew asked Mary to dance and the two of them moved towards the dance floor.

"So, how about it Evans? Does your friend date get the first dance with you?" he enquired, a teasing smirk on his face.

"Oh of course! It would be rude of me to share this occasion with anyone else!" she smiled back at him, and hooked her elbow through his offered arm. As they reached the dancefloor, the song changed to a slower ballad and couples began to slow-dance. James smiled inwardly, that was exactly what he had hoped for. He could see Lily trying to think of a way to avoid this, but he didn't let her speak. He simply took one of her hands in his and lay the other gently on her waist, pulled her close and began to lead her in a waltz. Lily wasn't particularly familiar with the steps, but she managed to follow James' lead reasonably well, the two of them laughing softly together whenever she stepped on his feet.

"I'm very impressed, Potter. I had no idea you could dance, let alone lead someone as uncoordinated as me," Lily joked as they spun slowly across the floor.

"Yeah, well my parents made me take dance classes when I was younger. I've been to a lot of wizard weddings, and they all expect you to be able to dance I suppose," he shrugged, blushing at her compliment. "And anyway, you're really not that bad." Lily laughed at him as their knees knocked together.

"Ok, so maybe you're not the finest dancer ever," James told her, "but I'm sure a little practice will help fix that!"

"Lucky I've got you to teach me then," Lily smiled at him. Damn she was pretty when she smiled, James thought.

* * *

James stared at the wall opposite the doors to the Great Hall. He really should stop spending so much time staring at walls, he decided. Lily had told him go on ahead upstairs to the common room where the after party would be getting underway, but he had insisted that he would wait until she was finished helping clean up the Hall. He could hear loud spells, and the sounds of furniture being shifted around as the prefects and teachers returned the Hall to it's normal state. He only had to wait for about ten minutes for the doors to open again, and the prefects all came out. James chatted with Remus for about a minute, then told him he'd meet him in the common room. Remus agreed and headed upstairs. James heard Lily and Andrew having a brief conversation with the Headmaster, then the two of them emerged into the foyer, chatting and smiling. Lily looked pleased that he was still waiting for her, and hooked her arm into his offered elbow. They made their way together to the common room, where the party had already started.


	20. Chapter 20

Lily marched across the common room towards James, looking deadly serious, and grabbed him by the arm.

"We need to talk, Potter." James stared at her in confusion, trying to figure out what he could have done to upset her, but then he nodded and followed her to a couch which had just been vacated by a bunch of sixth years in favour of the 'dance-floor' in front of the fire.

Lily sat down on the couch and stared at him. "I never meant it, you know. I was wrong, and I knew I was cruel but I just hated that you always had such an effect on me. And you were such an ass to Severus!"

"Lily, I have little to no idea what you're talking about," James told her, taking the half-full glass of alcoholic- smelling blue liquid from her hand, and sitting beside her

"Me being horrible! Don't tell anyone this, I've never told anyone this, it's a secret," she slurred, leaning into him. "But I think I used to get so angry at you because I liked you. Like-liked you." James stared in bewilderment as Lily giggled like a twelve year old.

"You what now?"

"I had a crush on you, I just never wanted to admit it. And in my head you were supposed to be my knight in shining armour, but then you weren't, you were just James, and you were an arrogant bully and I hated you for not being who you were in my head, you know? I mean, then it turned into actually disliking you for your actions, but that's why it started," Lily looked up at him with surprisingly clear eyes.

James was reeling from the information, from the alcohol, from the fact that she had used his first name, and from the fact that Lily in her drunken state had decided to spill all of this to him, of all people.

"You're not making much sense, Evans. And I can't tell how much of it is because you're drunk, and how much because I am, but I think maybe you should go to bed," he suggested gently, moving to pull her to her feet.

"No, listen! I never meant to be such a bitch to you, and I'm sorry. Because, Potter, you're actually rather nice," Lily whispered, swaying tipsily as she got to her feet. Before he could respond with an apology of his own, Lily's arms were around his neck and her lips met James. The kiss started out soft, but within seconds turned passionate as James wrapped his arms around Lily and pulled her closer, opening his tongue to let Lily's enter his mouth. Her lips were soft and warm, and James forgot everything else in the world as he got lost in her. Lily stumbled forward slightly, and James broke the kiss as he attempted to steady the both of them. He ended up falling back onto the couch behind him, but he just shrugged and pulled Lily onto his lap. She giggled and complained quietly but was kissing him again within seconds.

Most people in the room were too caught up in their own conversations, snogging sessions or drunkenness to notice Lily and James' display. Mary, however, who had hardly drank anything, happened to glance over at the couch where Lily was currently grinning at James as he twirled a strand of her hair around his finger, telling her how pretty it was. Mary just about fell over in shock, then quickly elbowed Remus and Sirius who had similar reactions as Lily leaned in to kiss James again.

"Oh Merlin, how drunk is she?" Remus groaned.


	21. Chapter 21

James attempted to roll over and groaned as his entire body revolted against him. He had a splitting headache, his stomach was churning and his mouth was dry and tasted disgusting. It must have been a good night, he thought to himself, taking stock of the hangover. Oh yeah, the ball and the after party. He had a small, quick panic attack as he searched his memory for the ball. He relaxed again as he remembered eating and dancing with Lily and escorting her back to the common room. So he had been fine at the ball, and the drunkenness which had caused this hangover had happened later. Lily wasn't going to hate him. There was something niggling at his mind though, an image of her face incredibly close to his, and soft warm lips against his own. James sat bolt upright in bed, hangover-related pain forgotten. No, it couldn't have been. Maybe he had kissed someone else, last night when he was drunk, then dreamed that it was Lily? But the more he thought about the more he was convinced that cuddling and kissing with Lily on the couch had been real. He even remembered her laughing at him as he tried to heroically carry her up the stairs, only to go sliding back down and dropping her against the banister.

"Good to see you're alive," Peter commented from his own bed where he was draining a hangover potion.

"Mmm. Gimme one of those things." The small vial of purple potion came flying at James' head from the wrong side of the room. He caught it confusedly, quickly downing the whole thing.

"Cheers Moony, I needed that," James shook his head as the potion took effect.

"Good night last night, James?" Remus asked with a cheeky grin.

"Yeah, I think so. My memory's a bit fuzzy though. Say, Moony, did I umm, you know, make out with Lily last night?" James' attempt at being casual had Peter and Remus in hysterics. James assumed that it was because he hadn't, in fact kissed Lily and his friends found the very suggestion hilarious. Luckily there was one kind person in the dorm that morning.

"Of course you did Potter, you were making out with her for about half an hour," Marlene's head popped out between the curtains around Sirius' bed.

"Right, thanks Marlene. Oh Merlin, I kissed Lily!" A huge grin spread across James' face as he savoured his slightly blurry memories. Then it turned into a look of horror as a realisation hit him.

"Oh crap, is she going to hate me? I took advantage of her when she was drunk? Why did I do that? She's never going to speak to me again!"

"Actually," Marlene interrupted his panicked rant, "she started it. So if any one was taken advantage of it was you."

"Yes, and you were a right idiot about it at the end of the night," Sirius chipped in, his voice rough. "She wanted to stay cuddled up on the couch with you but you insisted, what was it again Moony? Oh yes, 'the fair maiden must get her beauty sleep in her own pure bed'."

"She started it!" James exclaimed happily as he remembered Lily unexpectedly pulling his face down to meet her lips. "She doesn't hate me, she likes me. She kissed me!" Sirius laughed at his friend's excitement while Marlene rolled her eyes and left to find Lily.

* * *

Marlene entered the girls dormitory to the sound and smell of Lily retching into a bucket Mary had transfigured from a cup. Mary was rummaging through the cupboards in the bathroom, searching frantically for something.

"Hey Marlene, where're those hangover potions you have? And have you seen my anti-nausea potion?" She called as she saw Marlene coming in.

"Hangover potions are in my trunk," Marlene swiftly walked to said trunk and fished out the potions, tossing one to a sorry looking Alice and putting another on Lily's bedside table. Lily reached for it but Marlene snatched it back.

"Uh-uh Lils, you need the anti nausea stuff first or this will come straight back up," she warned. "Mary I think the anti- nausea potion is under the sink. Unless we took it all last night after watching Lily and James' disgusting display," she smirked at her ill friend. Lily looked up in confusion, but when she opened her mouth to ask she started vomiting again.

"Got it!" Mary called, hurrying back into the dorm. She waited until Lily had stopped throwing up again, then handed her the two potions.

"Oh thank Merlin," Lily groaned as her stomach finally felt still, her head cleared and the vomiting stopped. "Have I told you guys recently that you're the best? Because you are. You just saved me from hell, seriously what was that? I didn't know a hangover could hurt so bad!" Marlene and Alice laughed at her while Mary vanished her bucket disgustedly. The three of them crowded onto Lily's bed, wondering how much of the night she was going to remember.

"So, Lils," Mary began conversationally, "now that you're feeling better, did you enjoy last night?"

Lily looked at her friends in confusion as to why they were all crowded curiously around her. "Umm yeah, it was great. The ball went better than I had hoped and I think everyone enjoyed it. Didn't they?"

"Yeah yeah, the ball was great. How about the after party though?" Marlene pushed.

Lily groaned at them. "Look, I know it was pretty out of character for me but it's the only time I've been completely smashed ever, and I have excellent stories about the three of you in worse states than I probably was, so please don't torture me with this."

"Yes, well it was pretty funny that you were so drunk, but that wasn't actually the part we wanted to hear about," Alice told her.

"What part are you talking about then? Because honestly my memory's pretty fuzzy."

"Oh my God, you don't remember it," Marlene cracked up laughing.

"Should we tell her?" Alice pondered, turning to Mary and Marlene.

"Tell me what?" Lily demanded.

Mary ignored her. "Yes, I think so. I mean otherwise Potter will tell her and that won't end well for anyone."

"True. It would be funny though, watching him try to tell her," the three of them cracked up at that while Lily glared daggers at them all.

"Tell me what the hell you're talking about! What would Potter want to… Oh Merlin." The other three girls only laughed harder as a look of realisation crossed Lily's face, closely followed by horror. "I snogged Potter, didn't I? Oh Merlin, why the hell did I do that? Why did I not push him away? What the hell is wrong with me?" She cradled her head in her hands, shuddering hysterically. Alice managed to stop laughing enough to answer the questions.

"Well Lil, yes you did. You did it because you were drunk, and I'm guessing because you've rather changed your opinion of him lately. I mean, you did go to the ball together. And you didn't push him away because you kissed him first, so that would have been incredibly harsh. And there are a lot of things wrong with you, but that's not the point right now," she grinned, falling into laughter again at Lily' expression.

"I kissed him first? What have I done? He's going to think I'm all in love with him or something, he probably thinks we're dating now! Oh my God, why did I get so drunk?"

"As fun as it is watching you rant and ask hundreds of pointless questions to no-one, it's really not that bad so you can calm down Lil," Marlene told her. "Yes, Potter has been crazy about you for years and last night was probably the best thing that's ever happened to him, but he's not delusional enough to think you're dating him or in love with him because of one kiss. He's just happy he has a chance with you at all. All you need to do is talk honestly with him about what you want."

Lily nodded as Marlene's reasoning settled into her brain. "Yes I guess you're right. Only problem is, I have absolutely no idea what I want!" And Mary, Marlene and Alice all broke down into laughter again, though this time Lily joined in.


	22. Chapter 22

Lily successfully avoided James for the rest of the weekend, and even managed to steer clear of him during the train trip back to London by waving him off with the claim of 'Head duties'. It wasn't that she didn't want to see him, just that she had no idea what to say. She liked him, and obviously he knew that now. But she also knew how long he had liked her for, and she didn't want to get his hopes up when she didn't know how serious their relationship could get.

Despite her inner turmoil, Lily couldn't help but grin when Potter's owl appeared at her window on the second afternoon of holidays, whilst she listened to her sister drone on and on about her new boyfriend.

* * *

 _Hey Evans,_

 _How are your holidays going? I was a bit disappointed I didn't get to catch up with you before we left Hogwarts, so I thought I'd write you a quick note. I just wanted to say I'm sorry if you feel uncomfortable about what happened at the party. I know you weren't exactly sober, and if you'd like we can forget it ever happened. Even though it was great, and I'd rather like it to happen again. But anyway, everyone really enjoyed the ball so good job on that too. And I hope you're having a good holiday. Talk to you soon I guess._

 _Yours truly,_

 _James Potter_

Lily couldn't help but smile as she scanned over the letter. He really was being very sweet about the whole thing, she realised. She grabbed a notepad off the kitchen table and quickly scrawled back a note, not giving herself the time to think about it or get nervous.

* * *

 **Hey Potter,**

 **Holidays are good, nothing too exciting but it's nice to be home. You?**

 **I don't really remember the party if I'm honest but I'm fairly sure we won't be able to just pretend it didn't happen. And I don't think I want to. I don't really know how to explain what I'm thinking though, it will probably be easier if we talk about it once we're back at school.**

 **Yours truly,**

 **Lily.**

James was jumping up and down with a letter clutched to his chest, while his owl looked on in shock when Sirius entered the room.

"What in the name of Merlin are you doing Prongs?"

"Lily wants to remember!"

"That's great, mate. I think most people enjoy having working memories. Mind filling me in on what exactly she's remembering?"

"The kiss! I told her we could pretend it never happened and she said she doesn't want to!"

Sirius tried to pry the note away to make sure James wasn't reading into it wrong but he wasn't letting go even as he began to scribble a response.

* * *

 **Hi Mary,**

 **How are the holidays? I'm so bored without you all, my sister is incapable of talking about anything but her new boyfriend. So Potter wrote me a letter, offering to forget the kiss. And I said I don't want to, which I don't, but I don't know what I do want and I told him I'd talk to him at school and I have no idea what to say – help me!**

 **Love,**

 **Lily.**

* * *

 _Hey Lily,_

 _I told Rembrandt to laugh at you, but since owls aren't very good at laughing and I don't want you to miss it, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You can take that as an 'I told you so', because I did. You like Potter, Lily, so just tell him that. He's not a complete idiot, despite what 15-year-old-Lily is trying to convince you, he's not going to propose to you just because you go on one date. He knows exactly how you used to feel and I'm sure he'll be ecstatic to take things slow if that's what you want. Just be honest._

 _Love,_

 _Still laughing Mary._

 _P.S. holidays are good etc. etc._

Lily looked at the letter and sighed. So much for Mary helping to clear things up. However, she couldn't help but feel that maybe her annoying, still laughing friend was right, and that maybe she did like Potter as more than a friend.


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: So this is the final chapter of my first fanfic. Please review and tell me if you liked it, hated, or think there is something I really need to work on for next time (like making my characters less-alcohol dependent). Thanks for reading!**

Lily was busy with Head duties and catching up with friends (also known as being laughed at by Mary, Alice and Marlene) when she arrived back at Hogwarts the Sunday before classes started, and consequently had still not had her 'talk' with Potter by the time they began class on Monday with Defence Against the Dark Arts.

"Alright class, today I've brought in a boggart to revise the Ridikulus Charm in case it comes up in your NEWTS," Professor Zabini swept across the front of the room, clearing space in front of a small cabinet that was rattling violently.

"Line up, please, I want to get through this as quickly as possible so we can move onto revising stunning spells for the second half of the lesson." The class quickly got up and formed a line in front of the cabinet. Lily ended up standing right behind James, in front of Marlene. Marlene was chatting on about what spells were likely to be on the Defence NEWT exam, but Lily was struggling to concentrate on her friends' words. She could feel heat radiating off of Potter's back, and smell his comfortable scent; a mixture of musk, vanilla and grass. She was smiling at his back at something Marlene said when he turned around and saw her. He smiled back automatically, whispering a friendly "hey" as Peter successfully turned a Filch's cat-shaped boggart into a fluffy, purring cushion. Before they could say much more than greetings and "how were your holidays", it was James' turn with the boggart.

He stepped forward and Lily recoiled in shock as it turned into a dead body, which Lily recognised as James' mother. His face went deadly pale and he froze with his wand in the air. The boggart quickly transformed into his dead father, then dead Sirius, a dead Remus, a dead Peter and finally a dead Lily. She froze; it was an odd experience seeing yourself dead on the floor. James glanced over at her, and then managed to cast the Ridikulus charm and turn the boggart into a blow-up sex doll, which had most of the boys in the class in hysterics. Lily quickly stepped forward to take her turn, and cast the charm sufficiently to turn a huge snake into a small bracelet, even though her thoughts were completely elsewhere.

As soon as class was over she was out of the classroom, running towards her favourite spot in the castle for when she wanted to be alone. It was a tiny window alcove on the fifth floor which looked out over the lake, but was in an area of the castle where there were no classrooms and so she was very rarely interrupted. Which is why it came as a surprise when this time, she heard a voice say her name not five minutes after she had arrived there. She was curled up with her arms wrapped around her knees, staring out across the grounds when Potter appeared behind her, a worried look on his face.

"Are you ok?" He asked gently, coming to sit on the other side of her cushioned window seat.

Lily laughed shakily. "Yeah, I'm fine, just a bit shocked I guess. It's not every day you see yourself lying dead on a classroom floor."

"Yeah, sorry about that. If it helps, I wasn't expecting it either," he smiled anxiously.

"It's not your fault," she reassured with a small smile. She braced herself for the conversation she knew they needed to have. "So I guess we should talk."

"Yeah, we should. There is one little thing I wanted to ask first though," James said teasingly, grinning at her in his usual cheeky way.

"And what was that little thing?" Lily asked, confused.

"Well I'm not sure how good your memory is, but I seem to recall you telling me you'd kiss me over your 'own dead body'," he made airquotes with his fingers around her words. "And I know I'm a bit delayed, but we were standing over your dead body about twenty minutes ago."

She laughed at him for remembering her exact words, but he pushed on. "And also we've already kissed, but I'd quite like to do it again, sober so I can go find that boggart if you'd like and-" he was silenced suddenly as a grinning Lily leaned forward and pressed her lips to his.

It was a short, sweet kiss, and when Lily pulled away James couldn't help smiling like an idiot. She looked at him shyly. "So, what does all this mean?" she gestured between them.

"Well, what do you want it to mean? I think you know that I like you Lily, and I'm getting the impression that you do to, since you, you know, attacked me with kisses at the party before we went home for holidays and kissed me again just now."

"I mean, you know this is pretty new for me and I don't want to lead you on but I do really like you too and I'd like to see what happens."

James smiled at her, and took her hands. "Well then Lily Evans, will you go out with me now?"

She squeezed his hands and leaned closer to him. "Yes, James Potter, I will go out with you now."


End file.
